It feels like ladyluck isn't smiling at me anymore.
For 20 years of my life, god has done his part by watching over me.
I've been save, been so protected so far that nthg serious ever happened to me. & Im so thankful for that.
Bcos I've grew up in a so protected surrounding that I usually get what I wanted, so reliant on others esp the family, I realised how much that I couldn't accept failures or disappointments. My bad. I know. & Im trying hard to accept this which Im so not willing to.
Dad was right. Since young, I havent been really putting in effort in anything I do. Not exactly just effort, but putting in my best. Im like leading a happy-go-lucky life, taking a step at a time, with no desires, no plans, no goals, no dreams & no future.
That unexpected rejection letter has caused a great impact on me. Im like a lost sheep right now, leading life aimlessly, not knowing where and how I should move on from here.
Even up til now, I didnt really sit down & spend some time giving a hard thought of how & when. I deserve a good scolding or brain-wash on this issue which nobody has ever given me.
If only I own a magic mirror which tells the future , or rather a time machine which can turn back or fast forward time...
On a happier note, I've got a couple of supportive people around me which made me felt even worst :(
This feeling sucks totally, & I blame myself hard on this.
Im praying for a better days ahead ..
Anyway, over-dued photos..
Some faces were replaced cos they really looked f.ugly that I feel like giving myself a tight slap on my face. haha! But I still wanna post them up cos Mili Sissi is really good at photograghy that she made me looked so slimmmm in these photos! I know this is deceiving, but tt's the nature & objective of photographs. Right?
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Ending this post with my irresistable Mili Sissi..
Goodnight Earth !
God, I hope you hear me :)
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